Today God opened my eyes to the current state of my life, and the need for the support of people who love me. It can be the most humbling thing to ask for help, I have felt that tonight. My inability to say no, and my drive to please the world, have brought me to a place where many aspects of my life have suffered. I haven’t had the time needed for quality time building relationships that count. If committed to things and let people down. I’ve let the things that I’m doing push out my time with the Lord. I felt the affects of all of this.

I have two special people that love me and continue to look out for me. I’ve let that relationship suffer the most. This is something I can’t let myself do anymore. I feels so relieving and amazing to have friends that love you so much that they are willing to say the hard things, and at the same time be there to help you get back on your feet. These are the kind of relationships we all need, especially as Christians. This is the kind of Christian life I want to live. One where Christian brothers and sisters can feel free to say the hard things and be authentic. Where there isn’t a desire to cover up our sins and live fake outward lives. I think the life I crave so much is the perfect one God promises to us in heaven. It’s even in the downfall times like this that God can give us a glimmer of what we will experience in heaven with Him. Praise God!

One final note, I want give my deepest apolagizes to those of you that might be a reader and someone I have neglected. I ask for your forgiveness. And I pray that God will do His work in me to correct that.